pick one : jenny/jenga/jentle/jengi/itchy/jk

2004

what's this year been? i mixed bag i would say... i've done lots, been quite busy, tried new things, stuck with old ones, experienced lots of changes in my life and others lives, seen more of the world, shared joy, shared sorrow, cried the most i ever have in a year, laughed my head off the hardest i ever have, seen God work, lost friends, met new people, failed, succeeded, lost, gained... all such things as you probably do in many different years of your life. in some ways, i don't feel like i've come far at all. i am a year older. not sure if i'm a year wiser. but i'm glad for a faithful, compassionate and patient God. a God who loves me. a God who is with me into 2005 and for always. a God who knows me more intimately that any other person or being. and who loves me regardless. and that makes things ok.

i decided as sam and i were watching deep blue last night, i would have made a very poor marine biologist after all. but i love it. some pretty amazing footage. and musical score.

it's funny thinking about my tertiary education (not marine biology, but resource management) and how much i will not ever ever use that.

yup

how do you help someone who doesn't act like they want to be helped??

Psalm 56:3

When I am afraid, I will trust in you.

samaul turnball

i am very excited that i have two doses of sam in two days, and possibly three doses in three days. that is much exciting. oh i do love sam. such an awesome friend. someone to know so well, and to know me well back. someone that you know anything's cool. someone to do nothing with. or something with. and someone you're never awkward around. that kind of friendship rocks. and i'm glad i have it with sam. hoorah. seeing him tomorrow night will be good. i think it will be theraputic, and helpful. someone i can relax with. and forget myself with. thank goodness for that.

Proverbs 4:7

Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom.
Though it cost all you have, get understanding.

i heard this morning, that as the death toll pushes 60 000, it could reach 100 000. 100 000 individuals. it's crazy. so incredibly crazy and sad.

i would urge you, as b suggested, to give. and to pray.

CARE Australia
Red Cross
Oxfam
UNICEF
World Vision

the trip home from the airport, we mixed it up a bit. there was tempe, and redfern, and anzac bridge. so it was most similar to my last trip. it's fun driving until you recognise something.

i reckon if i could, and if he'd let me, i would spend all my days hanging out with xander. i'd never get bored. except maybe if he slept a lot. hmm... which he does. oh well.

i can't believe sometimes how good i can be at putting on a mask. seriously. like tonight. even to my closest friends. no one has any idea. any idea at all. sometimes i think i don't really have feelings. that i'm quite emotionless. i don't like the idea of being so cold, so heartless.

i have such a headache.

potentially awkward social situation approaching

Charles McCreery, director of the US National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration's centre in Honolulu, which detected the earthquake and coming tsunami: "We tried to do what we could. We don't have contacts in our address book for anybody in that part of the world."

today is 'return of the king' day. me and debs are heading over to timbo's very soon. it's ok, we haven't really watched it since i got it on saturday. we only watched the cast commentary. and that doesn't count. oh how i love billy and dominic. luke - it's gold!

"there's a voice in the silence
piercing the darkness of my own selfish soul
there's a cry deep within me
a yearning to feel You, i look to You Lord

You are my rock, on You i stand
safe from the storms that surround me
You're my only rock, in You i can
don't have to rely on my own strength"

i am so in touch... my parents leave on wednesday. eh, whatever. i knew something was wrong coz mumma hadn't packed yet.

my parentals go to New Zealand for four weeks tomorrow. me and debs and xander have house to ourselves. well, actually, debs and xander do, coz i'm potentially away for three weeks of it as well. which is a bit sucky.

i'm incredibly surprised though. my mother doesn't seem to have packed yet. that must be the plan for today. it must be!

i think maybe i'm driving them to the airport in the morning. debbie and i both suck doing that. because we take unintentional and unplanned scenic routes home. it's funny. although i end up at the anzac bridge after travelling through redfern. she ends up at st marys cathedral, then back tracking to kings cross so then she knows how to get home. we're such women drivers sometimes.

i'm excited that maybe i might get better soon. i mean, my snot is still yellow. but there's less of it. and my cough isn't as chunky. so that's good. i am very tired. but i'm pretty sure that's just normal.

meanwhile, i think it must have been a camp thing, coz a number of us have colds now. so that's a bit weird.

i'm not sure how i feel about the next week. i'm predicting boredness. but if not, i'm predicting bummingness. and i don't like that much. so i don't know. i should catch up with zoe tomorrow, and then over the next week, with jeremy and sam and libby and libby and i don't know who else. i'll find people. oooh, and plan new years eve. oh how i want it to be fun!

it's been a sleepy christmas.

but hoorah for lachie's shiny new car. and for mini-catch up with my great mate sam. and for aloe vera tissues. and for return of the king (thanks timbo!!).

happy jesus' birthday

libby gave me a fun tshirt for chrissy... hehe (different colours but)

yay libby

i feel like such a nerd... i bought hillsong london, mainly coz of one song...

"every night, every day
i don't need to worry, no i celebrate
all the things You've done in me

and it's gonna be all right, 'cause You are in my life
yes it's gonna be all right
gonna be, gonna be, gonna be, gonna be all right
and it's gonna be all right, 'cause Jesus You're my light
and You have shown me the way
all of my troubles, all of my life I give to You my King"

and coz of 'history maker' too

i'm definitely talking to myself outloud more

much fun was yesterday.
after a slow start to the morning, involving much procrastination from cleaning my room, and a walk to pennant hills, things got moving.
tim and i went chrissy shopping and lunching at hornsby. followed by some frisbee (tick!).
then i cleaned my gma's place (tick!).
then tim and i visited the wade's to drop off phoebe's chrissy pressie, and then to turra music, but it had closed at 8pm (what is turramurra music doing closing on christmas eve eve at 8pm!! especially when it's a thursday night... grrr).
back home to wait for debs and luke.
then the four of us drove to parramatta westfield. along with the rest of the world it seems. so many people. i don't think i've been to that westfield before. i had so much lostness.
drove around the carpark for half an hour finding a spot. luke picked up, and we got a spot, which was much awesomeness.
got pressie for parentals, for libby, for me.
we had some dinner? supper? snacks? in the foodcourt (not 'foodcourt on one'!)... i laughed very very loudly at one stage. but it was a noisy foodcourt so i think it was ok.
and then we left after midnight.
unfortunately luke was unsuccessful in his purchasing endevours. however, i ticked off my purchasing needs (tick!). as did tim, sort of. deb was just along for the ride.
so hoorah.
it was super fun to hang out with those three again. just like old times. like super old times. i do enjoy the company of tim, luke and deb. you guys are tops. yay.
and this morning, after stupidly staying up til 2:40am to watch amazing race and apprentice with debs, at 10:30am, i am going beaching with kirri and libby and debs (tick!)

i'm writing my will. using the legal will kit and everything. so grown up. how fun is that. i get to write fun stuff. howie, you get my pink jumper. tim, you get my flute. my family get and/or distribute the rest.

oooh, and welcome home david!

may i introduce to you, mr joshua blair...

it's like i'm not quite sure what to do with my time now. no structure with no work. my tummy is nervous thinking about that and i'm not quite sure why. i know that i have to clean my grandma's place within the next 24 hours. i also have to clean my room. i'd like to go to the beach tomorrow with debbie, liberachi and kirri. i'd like to catch up with tim. i need to do some shopping. i'm meeting up with junior tomorrow at 7:30pm. i have the reflective service at 9pm. i'd like to just sit and watch a DVD. i'd like to see people i like and haven't seen for a long time. but do you know what, i'll probably just sit on MSN. nahhhhhhhhhh......

we're using firfox instead of internet explorer for some reason at home. tpg doesn't like hotmail or something? whatever. but firefox doesn't like the bold, italics, underline and link buttons in MT

yup

i really really am

hotmail seems to have died

i only just realised my second cousin, pip, her daughter's name is lucy. and 'pip' and 'lucy' are two of the names i've liked for daughter's names for ages. but pippen instead of philippa. (i'm not sure of the punctuation in that first sentence)

now does that make lucy my third cousin? my second cousin once removed? my fourth cousin? she is the daughter of my mother's cousin's daughter. or the granddaughter of my mother's cousin. or the great great niece of my grandmother. or the great granddaughter of my great aunt. i'll stop now.

i wonder where things like 'great' and 'grand' originated in reference to ancestory.

how fun is unexpectedly exchanging rapid fire emails with someone on the other side of the world... yay for tamara!!

the chunky morning cough is so incredibly gross

libby just asked me "is it just my observations or are you sick a lot?"...

i haven't really thought about it. i do get colds often. but i wouldn't think of myself as being sick lots. i would think of howie as being sick lots. everyone except steve is sick in our office at the moment. he'll get there. maybe it's because of the work we do. i remember talking with libby mcphail about healing ministry and sickness earlier this year. and about Satan using sickness against us, attacking us. maybe there's truth in that because of the work we're involved in? i don't think God wants us to be sick all the time.

whenever i have a cold, the idea of cutting off my head is very appealing

i met mr joshua blair this evening. he was asleep. this tiny little thing in a huge cot. but what a little angel. very much the cute. i didn't get too close coz i have a cold. but what a gorgeous little child. hoorah for phil and shazzy.

its a dilly of a pickle

sick. hot. tired. emotionally drained. sore. burnt. hungry. gross.

but still a good weekend by all accounts. VERY much exhausted. everyone.

goodbye scottie

i have 45mins to shower, pack, clean my car, scavenge for board games, clean my room, clean my stuff out of the living room, get to church.... no worries.

bring on lake macquarie!

oooh so many paint fumes. i think everyone in my house is going crazy. my mother is hilarious this morning. and deb and i are having funny conversations. it's good fun. this checker board will be done one day (well, has to be done today!). hopefully the conenct four side too... but we'll see.

gap camp in like 6 hours. i have to pack. and shop. and paint. back to it...

(sorry tim, no msn)

some things are so overwhelming. or fear-making. fear and overwhelmment that could reduce me to tears. things seem to be spiralling out of my control. i think that's my issue. coz i know they aren't spiralling out of His control. but that doesn't seem enough at this point.

i can't imagine travelling to some far flung place like uganda, or dominican republic, or tanzania, or india, or sulawesi, or bangladesh, or jordan (although i have been there), or mexico... i have much respect for the people i know of that have or are or will be. and for a purpose much bigger than sightseeing.

i hope i don't fall into microsleep mode on way home from gap camp on sunday. last year was very very close. eek. it's ok if i crash and die. but not if there are four young people in my car that i take down with me!

meanwhile, christmas is quite the soon. although i don't think it feels much like it. i don't know what it's meant to feel like. but probably not this. it's funny how things like birthdays and christmas lessen in excitement as you get older. probably as presents don't mean as much anymore. i am excited about the reflective service on christmas eve. i do like that service. if janita sings 'o holy night' again, i'll struggle not to well up!! christmas this year is a little strange. different. no longer at eastwood. but turramurra for the day. and no christmas with dad's side of the family. no driving a million miles in a day like last year - that was fun although it was hot. i dunno it feels a little empty. not because of the reason. the reason for christmas is tops. i am very thankful that Jesus was born and celebrating that. but on the less spiritual side of things, it feels a little empty this year.

and meanwhile, hello luke dawson. how are you plans for new years going?? you were the one thinking of something fun!!!

yippee!

oh but it does seem like so much to do and so little time

gap camp is gonna rock!

except i'm sad no tamara or lachy :(

i need to use my time more wisely. i need to sleep more and better. i need to treat my body better. i need to be present.

dog tired

and God is so good... how's the weather today!! up this morning: brilliant sunshine - even at 6am. sunshine all day for the trip. great stuff - since activities included water slide, ropes course, initiatives etc. and when's it start to rain: when we go inside for the night program. awesome. when does it stop raining: as we leave to head home. God's a good bloke.

i think its amazing that you can feel so connected with people you've met only two or three times in your life. it's crazy how it works like that. because the connection runs deeper. there are common goals and purposes. you know what's important to each other. and it's just so cool. i love the people i work with. not just here locally (coz they are tops) but across this city and state and country and yes, the world.

time, sleep & a movie

if it was a week from now, that would be tops. tomorrow's trip done. open day done. supper done. cleaning done. gap camp coming up. holidays closer. oh, it would all be good.

meanwhile, how does it work, that when you get more sleep, it makes you more tired?? silly silly body. i think it's perhaps that i don't sleep well, although i'm in my bed for longer. i pulled my nose stud out this morning at 1:20am. that was disruptive. but it did wake me up from a strange dream that i then had to analyse before going make to sleep.

i also saw ocean's 12 last night, with debs, tim and luke. deb and i decided it was 4.5/7. the second half was more like 5/7, but the first half was a bit slow and about 3/7. we felt 4/7 overall didn't do the film justice. so 4.5 it is. tim was very patient.

but muuuuuuuuum, i'm not a little kid anymore!

i want to go for a walk. but i'm not allowed. so i'm going to go to bed instead. two nights of pre-10:30pm bed time. that's tops.

some things in life just catch you by surprise don't they...

not all together a bad thing.

"Tramapoline! Trampopoline!"

i might not like much about Christmas... but there a few things i do enjoy...

-sinterklaas and a chocolate letter J in my clog
-our advent calender banner thingys
-almond bread
-the real meaning of Christmas
-the reflective service on Christmas Eve
-getting Christmas cards in the mail

welcome to the world Joshua Micah Blair!

oh how i love a sore throat. woohoo.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh

i have to write our family christmas letter this morning. aargh.

bringing back the black light for glow-in-the-dark handball

oceans 12 out next week

return of the king 4-disc dvd out soon

redbacks all out for 29. now that's not cricket.

hehe.

so, what if you get back to the office and are about to leave work, and start getting real dizzy and can't focus your eyes. so you say out loud "this is weird" and try focus your eyes. but that doesn't really work. so you say outloud "maybe i should sit down". so you sit down on the ground. but your eyes are still going crazy. so you think, i'll just lie down. so you do and shut your eyes for a little while. then you're fine, so you drive home. hmm... is that all good??

it was pick on jenny day

coz howie and josh are pretty funny! they dragged me up the street as well. josh has video footage.

"just one of the boys"

people dying is a sad thing. it is. i'm sad for liz's family. for the mcalpin's. at least it's something good, to know she's not in pain any longer. and that she's with Jesus. still, hard stuff for people left behind. hmmmm

something i read the other day that i just remembered about ... when we feel weary, we may think we’re weary of life. But in fact we’re really weary of death, sin and its consequences.

current champ with 10 zooper doopers. i'm not sure if josh is going for the 15.